Do you ever find yourself frustrated and confused by all the changes taking place in your life? You could have recently moved in pursuit of a new job/change of scenery, enrolled in school, just had a baby, are recently married, or transitioning from working in Corporate America to full-time entrepreneurship. Any of these lifestyle changes can cause major stress in your life, making you feel overwhelmed and often alienated. Many of those closest to you may raise their eyebrows at your lifestyle changes if they don't understand them or the lifestyle doesn't mirror theirs.
Sometimes in dealing with these lifestyle changes our circle of friends change and rearrange. This can leave us feeling vulnerable and alone. And while many of us retreat to ourselves and just continue on with life, the truth is nobody can make it out here alone. Every woman deserves to have a circle of friends she can depend on for love and support. Not only that, we feel better about ourselves if we are able to be all of those things and more to others. So if you've ever found yourself experiencing these feelings and in search of your own sister tribe, hopefully these tips will help you on your journey.1. Know what you're looking for in a tribe. Are you looking to make friends with other moms? Perhaps connecting with other members of your new church family? How about the ladies in your class that you seem to have a lot in common with? The first step in searching for your tribe is to know what you're looking for. Also you want to identify what qualities or interests you share. Are you looking for friends to go shopping with on the weekends? Someone you can have girls night out with? Someone you can meet at the coffee shop once monthly to vibe with? Or those business-minded women making power moves that you would like to make? Have in mind what types of connections you're wanting to make and take notes if you have to! I won't judge, sis.
2. Put yourself out there. This may seem like an easy phrase to say but it's one of the hardest steps to take, especially if you are an introvert like me. After you've determined what types of connections you're trying to make, put yourself out there. Go to the places you normally frequent, but actually make eye contact with people. Smile. Make small talk. Ask about local events and services. In order to create new connections and find your tribe, you have to make it known that you are open and interested in meeting new people.
3. Look for connections in new, unexpected places. Sometimes a change of scenery may be necessary when looking for fresh, new connections. If you're having trouble connecting with people in your neighborhood, there are many options and ways to connect with others online. I've found some of my closest tribe members online, especially with blogger friends and my Pretty Entrepreneur tribe. In these cases, it doesn't matter where you are located. As long as you are offering each other support, encouragement and knowledge, the tribe serves its purpose.
4. Show up and put your best self forward. Accept some invites, love. It's hard to get out there and meet new people (or reconnect with others) if you turn down every opportunity you get to be social. Stop talking yourself out of going places. Just take the plunge and do it scared! Erase any negative thoughts you may have about going and replace them with thoughts of expanding your circle. Don't forget to breathe easy and show yourself friendly.
5. Always make sure to follow up. Had fun at the last mixer and enjoyed the company of some new people? Gained some new contacts at that conference and have a few new business cards in your wallet? Well what are you waiting for? Let's use them! Putting yourself out there was the hard part, now you have a clear idea of the types of people you want to connect with further so don't be afraid to follow up with someone. This could lead to more opportunities to hang out and mingle with like minds!
How do you go about finding your tribe?
Let's chat in the comments!
photography courtesy of samantha sophia for unsplash
